Tuesday, September 28, 2010

I Will Be Famous Soon

Perhaps you don't know who I am.  That's okay.  You will.  I will be famous soon.

Here's how I know.

1) In high school, I won the DAR Good Citizenship Award.  That is given to one, count 'em, ONE student in the school.  And it went to me.  Me.  ME!  Someone please tell me what the words to the National Anthem are.

2) People are already asking me for money.  Here is a picture of the stack of mail next to my microwave dedicated to people who are asking me for money.

 

3) I work hard.  Really hard.  For at least 20 hours every week, I play with "at-risk" children.  If there's anything I've learned in my "regular" life so far, it's that people who work hard get what they deserve.  And that people who work with poor children get famous.  Fast.

4) An agent is currently considering the manuscript of my first novel "exclusively."  I don't know if you know anything about publishing, but when an agent considers your novel, it is virtually guaranteed that she will want to represent it.  And if she represents it, it is virtually guaranteed that a major publishing house will publish it.  And when a major publishing house publishes it, it is invariable that the author (me) receives a large advance and significant royalties - an amount to the tune of "I will never have to work again."  If there's money in anything, it's books.

I think that list will do.  I've given you five reasons why I will soon be famous. (The fifth being that I have a hunch).  That's enough to convince me, and as they say, you're your own worst critic!

Given, then, that I will soon be famous, it is important to me that, when I am a celebrity, I have a reminder of what it was like to be "regular."  Hence, the invention of this blog.  If you are also regular and want to say you knew me "when," or perhaps if you are already a celebrity who is trying to remember being regular, follow this blog.  It is here for all of our benefits.

1 comment:

  1. I want to be know as the guy who posted the 1st comment on your first blog post. This is my ticket to fame. :)

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